How Boudoir Changed my Life

Boudoir.

It’s a niche of portrait photography that focuses on the intimate. It’s about vulnerability, body positivity, consent, and self-love.

And no, it’s not porn.

I think that everyone needs to experience a boudoir session once in their life.

Yes, everyone.

When I had photos of myself done, it changed how I saw myself. No longer was I looking at my body square in the mirror like I do every day. I was seeing myself as a beautiful person, in my most raw form.

tasha boudoir session.jpg

From my own boudoir session

Picture by Tasha Koetsch

My first boudoir session was two years ago, and I gave my husband photos of myself before our wedding day. After I saw the photos, I then understood why my husband thought I was hot. I can honestly say I didn’t understand that before.

I understood why everyone, even gay men, would say “DAYUM!” when they saw my ass.

I understood that I am fucking worth it, even if I was single, even if I didn’t have an ass, even if I had nothing physical to offer the world with my body.

Above pictures by Tiffany Joyce and Brii Cher’ri

Vagina-having people are told every day that their body is not theirs.

That we are owned by someone else.

We are someone’s child. Someone’s spouse. Someone’s lover. Someone’s friend.

I’m here to say, fuck that.

WE ARE SOMEONE.

We are someone without being attached to anyone else. We are someone.

And that person, no matter what they look like, no matter what ethnicity, no matter what gender or lack thereof, no matter their height, weight, hair color, or eye color, is someone.

And all bodies are beautiful.

Boudoir helped me come to this realization.

When I shoot people through their lens who have so graciously offered up their bodies for me to create art, I am reminded of how diverse and beautiful this world is. How there is only one of them, and I get to make art and paint with light onto a sensor and show them that they, too, are fucking worth it.

I love seeing their reactions when I show them their photos. It reminds me of my same reactions when I saw mine. Is that me?!

I love boudoir so much that sometimes I selfie in front of my own DSLR just to see my body again and make new art. Below are some examples of my own selfies.

Some might say that these sessions are self-centered in nature. And they’re right.

There is nothing wrong with focusing on yourself.

There is only one you. You are the the only person that will be with you for the rest of your life.

It’s so simple to think about, but sometimes we forget this fact.

Boudoir is self care. It’s self-love. It’s healthy self-indulgence.

It’s body positivity. It’s body autonomy. It’s body care.

I can honestly say, without a shadow of a doubt, that boudoir changed my life. Every time I do photos of myself or of others, I am reminded that I am worth it.

It’s an amazing experience that everyone needs to do at least once in their life. You will not regret having a boudoir session.

McKenzie McClure